Cape Breton: Warm welcome or cold shoulder?

“Hi Cape Breton. I’m here trying to make friends!” I say this knowing you may not like what I have to say next.

Like many others that have come before, I’ve been drawn to this place because of culture, uniqueness and a warm welcome. Well, sort of a warm welcome. As a visitor I had mixed experiences. Some people would talk my ear off, and others wouldn’t really give me the time of day, although the warm welcome has been part of tourism marketing for Cape Breton for several years. As a new resident I called the Cape Breton Welcoming Committee who said they would be sending me a welcome package to the door of my new house and it never came.

There is the “come from away” syndrome - something that brings people together to bond from the misfortunes of those not fortunate enough to be born here (my definition). Though legendary, I really don’t think that things are as simple or general as that. Being from away doesn’t make one an outcast by default in Cape Breton. I think there is something more subtle at play here.

Cape Breton is place of cultural pride, perhaps unparalleled in Canada. The geography is part of what defines it, along with the generational history and ancestral bonds of people who mostly suffered but also prospered in this place I call home. The culture is what brings people here. They are curious. They want to be part of it. They want to hear all the stories. And Cape Bretoners love to share these stories. It make the place unique, and it is so very interesting. But these cultural ties are also what isolate people. People hold on to their culture so tight with like minded people that they refuse to let anyone in, even a little. This doesn’t just happen with people from away. Look at the various communities - New Waterford and Dominion for instance. In the past they were less accessible to each other. It’s like the past is still the present. One researcher attributed this to clan system traditions that were still subconsciously at play in the present day.

It has been no problem for me making acquaintances. People are good at small talk if they are forced into it. It’s been a little more challenging than other places to do this but not impossible. It’s making friends that is the real challenge. For the longest time I thought it was me but I really haven’t had problems anywhere else, and I've heard this story from many imports. There is this sense that people from away need to stick together because it is difficult to fully integrate. All this is doing is creating another insular group, following the lead of others. Dating someone that lives here did open some doors, but that can only take you so far. After the breakup I was back to square one and more confused than ever when people stopped talking to me.

I don’t think it is like this everywhere in Cape Breton. CBRM has been a bit of a trouble spot for me and many others I talk to in a similar position. People say it’s “small town mentality”. But if you take Cape Breton Regional Municipality as a whole it is pretty big, close to 100,000 people, similar to places like St. John’s NL, Thunder Bay ON, Langley BC. The difference I guess is that Cape Breton communities are still thinking of themselves as the smaller communities in all aspects even though they really aren’t that far apart, have similar interests and face the same problems. This really poses a challenge with infrastructure, attracting businesses, social issues and tourism planning. It is also a huge challenge for outsiders. Groups of people with shared interests stick together and seem pretty leery to let anyone else into their circle.

In May of 2015 the Nova Scotia Ministry of Immigration announced $174,000 in funding for new welcoming initiatives for immigrants to Cape Breton. It must be a huge culture change for new immigrants. Immigration, new ideas and perspectives are critical to a prosperous Cape Breton. In fact, they always have been since European settlement.

So what needs to change? It’s not only about investing to make sure people new to Cape Breton feel welcomed, it’s also about making Cape Bretoners feel more comfortable with new residents. People can still embrace culture and their way of life in times of change. The world is always changing. It can be embraced in hopes of a prosperous future for Cape Breton or it can be held on to until their is nothing left. New residents need to be part of the solution. How can they be included and feel comfortable living in Cape Breton?

Chris Bellemore is a blogger from Ontario that moved to Cape Breton Island and is logging his experiences in this strange and wonderful place.

https://www.facebook.com/chris.bellemore

https://soundcloud.com/crispbellemono

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Christian Murphy Follow Me
Hey Chris, anyone with a 24 of beer is typically welcomed anywhere in Cape Breton. Things are changing however, a good bottle of wine can get you through a few doors as well, beer is still preferred. With that said, I will say you're not completely wrong....trust when I say, I'm not the welcoming committee as my travels don't extend much beyond home and the grocery store. I stay pretty close to home. However, I would suggest joining a few groups, turns out there is a theater group active, seems an avid blogger may add a little to local writers perspectives. In any event, stick it out go and enjoy Ribfest and if you see me walking about with the family, walk over and say hi. I promise to be nice!
Chris Bellemore My Post Follow Me
Thanks for your comments Christian. It isn't all bad. I find it easier in some places than others. I've really put in an effort for quite through music, plays, exercise classes, writing without any real network. I've built up . There are just some things here that I find different. But those things that are different brought me here. Cape Breton is an amazing place. I just don't think some people realize how much of a transition it can be for people.
Joe Ward Follow Me
What really lead you here, Chris? Family connection? Also, what were the issues you noted in the Sydney area? Everyone is best friends until the 24 case is empty. Then it's drunk boxing. So I'm not sure the 24 method is the best idea. :P
Chris Bellemore My Post Follow Me
Basically the hope for a better life. I've always loved the culture, history and the ocean out here. Your comment is too funny. I mostly box my shadow in that state vbut still end up losing.
Kelli Jackson Follow Me
I'm late to the kitchen party on this! I agree with everything you've said. I'm from North Sydney, but left at 18 to go to uni in Halifax and moved back in 2004. I made a few friends, but no one really close or who I hung out with until I'd been back for eight years. EIGHT YEARS to make ONE friend! I have found that it's extremely difficult to fit in/connect with people in CB when you don't have the same life structure, for lack of a better term, as they do. (And by that I mean in a serious relationship and/or having kids... and let's be honest, childless and singular isn't really how CB does things.) I also was asked a disappointing number of times why I went to Saint Mary's University rather than CBU. Never mind that I started uni in 1997 when CBU was still UCCB, and a very different place than it is now. Jeez, I was only on the mainland! I sometimes felt like if there wasn't something genuinely wrong with me, people would find something. I mean really, I listen to metal and I'm kind of a jackass, but the fact that I went to school on the mainland made people go, "wtf demon spawn, back away slowly"? ;D I don't think it matters what type of circles you run in or where you were born and raised. It's just hard to fit in if you've done things differently, whether by chance or choice.
Janice King Follow Me
Check your privilege. Imagine that instead of relocating to Cape Breton, you relocated to Tanzania and consequently met people who were part of the Bantu tribe. Would you have the same expectations - to make friends? To be accepted? to be part of the community? Or would you rather respect their culture - and their boundaries - and not imply that there was something wrong with a group of people who were resisting "multiculturalism" and the economic forces of globalism? How long would you expect your integration into the community to take? A year? Two? Just because Cape Bretoners are white like you does not mean that, also like you, they are happy to lose a way of life that is valuable, and valuable precisely because it is *not* multicultural. I pray that Cape Bretoners change their focus from "welcoming outsiders" to strengthening their families, and their communities. They should be proud - fiercely proud of their way of life. Sadly, when I visit, I notice that they are drawing on the cultural wealth of their ancestors and not making deposits anymore - largely as the result of global economic forces and a move away from the faith of their fathers. Divorce is rampant and there are fewer and fewer children in rural communities... If you think I am a bigot - consider the Bantu example again. Imagine the Bantu tribe was declining. Work traditionally done in the local tribal community has been outsourced to China - to the US - to Europe...they have lost their craftsmen, their religious rituals and their children don't remember their own language anymore. My guess is you would view this as tragic. Why not the same view of CB? Go back to writing in your coffee shop in Ontario. Cape Bretoners are lovely people - and I pray that they resist outsiders (yes, even like me!) - for as long as they can.
Joe Ward Follow Me
Let's hope that the communities receiving the thousands of Cape Breton people who leave here every year, don't think like you. Did you think there was just one big boat from Scotland that arrived, and the Mi'kmaq people said: "They look like nice people. Let's give them all the best plots of land"? Welcome those who arrive as "people", not "outsiders". That welcoming mindset strengthens our community and the families within it, those rooted, and those newly joining us. We should be very fortunate that, despite our population leaving, there are people that will still consider coming here and making a life here. If we want to slow our decline, it's time to put our finest welcome mats out on the doorstep.
Janice King Follow Me
Why are people leaving Cape Breton? The decline of the local economy. The corporate global forces of consumerism and materialism have destroyed the Cape Breton economy - add a dose of secularism and you have the recipe for cultural decline. You won't have a culture to welcome people into if these forces continue to their logical conclusion which is the death of both the family and the community. A welcome mat to an empty home is no welcome at all. Many Cape Bretoners, I observe, have a sense that something is wrong. What they've been told by the corporately owned media that does not have their best interests at stake is that they are not "diverse" enough. That's a load of bullsh*t. They are just fine the way they are. Corporate media has brainwashed us into thinking that the only way to be a community is to be "diverse" - whatever that is. On the other hand, there are many Cape Bretoners who fiercely and with dedication are attempting to breathe life into their families and communities via their faith - their language - their music - and their art. Hats off to them! How about subsidizing a family farm for any Cape Bretoner who wants to make a go of it - set up a co-op that will teach them the skills to make the highways lining the Bras D'Or once again lined with fruit orchards and livestock instead of being overgrown with alders. Quit the scolding that you learned at university from people who have no sense of the true gold - the true wealth of Family - Faith - and Community. Those "multiculturalists" have never experienced the value to human thriving of a vibrant family and faith. That's what attracts them to Cape Breton, unfortunately, their envy and arrogance would have Cape Breton turned into a natural history museum where the people are on display - "how quaint". As far as the Mi'kmaq are concerned - you make my argument for me: I'm sure they regret, at times, being so "welcoming"...
Joe Ward Follow Me
You seem to have a belief that celebrating any of the traditional cultural subsets that make up the demographic here, and welcoming new people as we have done in the past, are somehow "mutually exclusive" with the other things you desire. Chris coming here hasn't caused anyone to tear down the Big Fiddle or pass a municipal bylaw that prohibits fruit orchards. ;)
Janice King Follow Me
I don't think they are mutually exclusive at all - as I stated "A welcome mat to an empty home is no welcome at all". The alternative to the current fad of globalism/multiculturalism is not emptiness and despair - it is thriving families - communities and local economies who then, if they wish, with no compunction - may welcome 'outsiders' if they desire to do so...
Joe Ward Follow Me
So they're not mutually exclusive to you, you just don't think you can do them both at the same time? :) "... who then, if they wish..." We'll turn around our economy, and then we'll be more open to having new people join our community...
P Sheehan Follow Me
Being a "Cape Bretoner" is about an identity that is comprised of all sorts of elements . Anyone who moves here will get a sense that Cape Bretoners will all seem to have a certain pride and deep "roots" . The question is how do you attract investment and attract people ? Well, you first have to start by identifying what you have to offer . Our Municipalities seem to do very little to be proactive about attracting investment and new residents . It has to be an on-going continuous effort .As you drive to any village or even Sydney ,what do you see that shouts out "welcome "?? Is there a nice sign , some flower garden area , a place to pull over and get information ?
Chris Bellemore My Post Follow Me
First off, thank you Janice for expressing your opinion on this topic. I always appreciate someone willing to speak out over someone not willing to express their opinion. I wrote this during a time in my life when I did a lot of observing, and it has been circulated over the last two years. "Privelage" is a topic of internal discussion that we should all be having. Perhaps it is what this whole topic is about, but I think it is much more complex than just that. I speak to this topic out of interest and encouragement, not out of resentment and hate. I learn something new every day living on this island and the conversation is more important to me than the writing. You speak to culture like there is one and only one that is well understood. Maybe it's prompted by my generalities. If so, I'm sorry for leading you down that path. I believe Cape Breton is as diverse as anywhere I have been, although there are some feelings that are shared and unique to other places. There are things I really appreciate and things I don't. I write about it because it interests me. I don't expect everyone to like it. I do it to start the conversation, and thank you for taking part in it.
Gale MacDougall Brown Follow Me
Thank you, Chris. I appreciate reading your comments and those of others about integrating into the culture of Cape Breton. We've been considering a move to CBI from Ontario, and although my Scottish family history in CB goes back to 1802, I was born 'away', and am the last of my 'known-to-me' family. When visiting there I feel a very strong connection and understanding of the culture, but it may not translate into friendships once settled in. I think one has to be a persistent 'joiner' of groups no matter where they move in order to break ice. And of course, some groups are more welcoming than others. More food for thought.

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