A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, on Monday, here on Earth, this picture appeared on Twitter...

He's looking deep within my soul, making my greatest nightmares manifest.

After the initial shock of seeing any doll with a vacant death-stare sitting next to my name, I thought "They're not talking about me. There are plenty of Rorys around Cape Breton. There were two on Rigby Road alone!" Then I saw it...

Oh...oh god...

They Tagged me. Good lord, they tagged me...

At first, I was flattered, then scared, then I peed a little. Let's get this out of the way. I have NO IDEA who @PhotoCapeBreton is. I repeat, this is a TOTAL MYSTERY to me. This picture leads to way more questions than answers. Actually, it leads to no answers, so the answer to question ratio is 0 : a bunch. 

Are they a fan? Probaly not. Most people's opinion of me hovers steady at a lukewarm "OK" which only makes me cry sometimes. Is this a death threat, or worse, are they going to kill my cat? (Please don't kill my cat. I love my cat.) Are they calling me out for a knife fight? Do I have a stalker? (Intriguing!)

Well whatever the case may be, I'm not one to take fandom/death threats/cat death threats/knife fight invitations/potential stalkers lying down. But where will I get all that tartan, or what I like to call "picnic table camouflage."

Luckily, my friends at Retakes & Revelries have a green screen, professional lighting, and Photoshop experience. With all our powers combined, we have created something something truly magical.

Did I nail the creepy doll death-stare or what!

So there you go, @PhotoCapeBreton. I'll play your game. The ball's in your court. What you got?!

To be continued...






P.S. Please don't kill my cat.